Republican friends. We all have them. Admit it. The last person to bring your family a casserole when you just got out of surgery was a Republican. Republicans really care about people. They have the best comfort recipes. Let’s not let them go at this point.
I have Republican friends. They want to like McCain, they’d really, really like to like Palin, but they are as different from Palin as I am. That’s why we’re friends. We’re real and she isn’t. Neither is he. He used to be, but for the last four years, he gave up the hard work of being who he is, and just started cashing the checks. I can’t blame him—he’s old, and surely he must be as tired right now as he was when he was living in a hole in Vietman. Standing over that hole, blocking the light, was a Vietnamese man, and now it is Sarah Palin, who is telling him that she knows more than he does, so maybe he should just shut up. Ah, the arrogance of ignorance. Ah, the comfort of being a POW. Which John is again. Isn’t it funny how our old stuff comes back to haunt us?
The election is coming near. We’ve bitched and moaned to our good, Democratic friends. We’ve preached to the choir. Now is the time to call up our old Republican friends, those folks from high school, or the job we had after we graduated. Those folks we really liked, but we’ve lost touch with. Last night I called Carole. We lived together 19 years ago. Her kids liked me, and I was totally surprised to hear that they still do like me. Wow! Is that cool or what? We began by talking about what affects all of us—the money problem. She admitted that she wasn’t about to vote for McCain, but she didn’t think Obama could do the job. We talked about that a bit, and I pointed out that McCain was old, and not that healthy, and would she really want President Palin? No way, she admitted. Even Obama was better than that. Bingo! What with her kids liking me and the fact that she now felt better about voting for Obama, it was absolutely worth those cell phone minutes!
So, my friends (to quote John), call your Republican friends. Talk to them. You already like them, so you’ll have lots to say, lots to catch up with. Tell them about McCain’s age, and how Palin has charged the state of Alaska for all those trips she took with her kids, and how she’ll continue to do that just because she does just what she wants, regardless of ethics or laws. She’s the perfect Republican, for sure, but what happened to our money? Do we want to continue down the road we’ve traveled for the last 8 years? Call them, ask them. Don’t be rude, just say one thing, the right thing, the one fact that fits for them. They’re all waiting to hear from you—they want a way out of voting for people who are even worse than the ones we’ve had for the last 8 years. And we didn’t think that was possible.
What have you got to lose?
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
How to Be a Maverick
The term “maverick” comes from Samuel Maverick (1803-1870), a Texas rancher who refused to brand his cattle. Turns out he didn’t brand his cattle because he didn’t like ranching, not because he was being stubbornly independent. Oh well, despite this, Maverick became maverick in the English language. And now, when you think about it, the true lack of veracity in the etymology of the word is very fitting now.
If you were to strive to be a maverick from an early age, just how might you go about it? First, I’d say that a maverick absolutely could not live at home and let their parents take care of them. You’d have to leave as soon as you could, in order to get started on the long, tough road to Being A Maverick (BAM).
Secondly, you’d have to be careful about what college you chose. It couldn’t be some well-known, hard-to-get-into-but-it-looks-fantastic-on-the-resume college, it would have to be something nobody ever heard of. The College of Hard Knocks and Knockwurst Production, perhaps. Or maybe correspondence schools. A divinity degree would be one good choice.
It would be important to evade military service if you were male, and to seek it out if you were female.
Choosing a career would be the next important step in BAM. It is imperative to avoid large corporations or government service. Working for a non-profit would be a good start, especially if you worked as a volunteer, without pay, and made an income by selling an unusual product online, especially one that was homemade. This would probably limit your income enough to qualify as BAM, since it is doubtful that there have ever been wealthy mavericks. If there are any, they take no deductions, while striving to pay as much of the tax burden as possible.
Once a career has been chosen, it is important not to stay with it too long, but instead to seek a new adventure every couple of years.
Marriage is the next big step. Well, not-marriage might be a better choice. They used to call it living together in sin. It would be important not to call that significant other husband or wife. Think of something else. Being gay would help—gay people have all kinds of different names for the people they aren’t allowed to marry. It would be essential to follow one’s own preferences, though, because mavericks are stubbornly independent, not people who bow down to societal expectations. Marriage to a person who is obviously quite different than you is a must. Different as to color, height (at least 18 inches), weight (at least 100 pounds), intelligence, wealth, career, family—radical differences here can all contribute to one’s success at BAM. Gender has an opposite effect in this case, however, since choosing a similar gender for not-marriage actually increases maverick-ness.
True mavericks are political. They vote. They vote in every election, and they vote about every issue and choose between every single candidate on the ballot, even the dogcatcher, should that be an elected position on the ballot. Not only do mavericks vote, they educate themselves about everything on the ballot, and make choices outside of party lines. No piddling Republican or Democrat, liberal or conservative, labels for them! Mavericks never worry about throwing their votes away by choosing a candidate with absolutely no chance of winning. They’ll even write in names if they want. Sure, it takes more time to BAM, but nobody promised you a rose garden, right? Besides, a maverick would prefer cactus to roses, but only in the Pacific Northwest.
Another biggie is choice of church or religion. It is important to realize that these are not necessarily related. One can be Buddhist in one’s soul while sitting uncomfortably in a Presbyterian pew. Adopting an unusual religion is of the essence. Perhaps one that requires yellow robes, and chanting and playing the tambourine in airports. There are untold numbers of outlandish religions to choose from. One could even switch every couple of years, just as one chooses a new career.
Choice of children is another area one must be careful about. Having children who are obviously related to each other is an impediment to BAM. This means that adoption is just about the only alternative. This is good, though, because there are a lot of children out there who really need a good, maverick, home. Bringing more children into a maverick-starved world is probably not a good idea. The only other viable choice is to have no children at all.
Probably the biggest choice that one must make in order to truly be a maverick is in personal values—how one lives life from a moral perspective. Just the fact that one actually lives life from a moral perspective! I’m not talking sex, here, when I speak of morals, I’m talking ethics, principles, integrity, what guides your decisions, how you decide what is right and what is wrong.
I’ve heard of a true maverick who suggested that we all live our lives according to the Golden Rule. You know, do unto others? This was said in all seriousness, and it was suggested that we could all think this way. Ask how an action of yours might affect someone else, and then do it if you’d like it done to you, and don’t do it if you wouldn’t. Even if you personally gained from doing something to others that you wouldn’t like to have done to you. Isn’t that amazing? This is where the rubber meets the road, potential mavericks. This is the grad-school of maverick-ness. Have you got what it takes to graduate with a BAM degree?
If you were to strive to be a maverick from an early age, just how might you go about it? First, I’d say that a maverick absolutely could not live at home and let their parents take care of them. You’d have to leave as soon as you could, in order to get started on the long, tough road to Being A Maverick (BAM).
Secondly, you’d have to be careful about what college you chose. It couldn’t be some well-known, hard-to-get-into-but-it-looks-fantastic-on-the-resume college, it would have to be something nobody ever heard of. The College of Hard Knocks and Knockwurst Production, perhaps. Or maybe correspondence schools. A divinity degree would be one good choice.
It would be important to evade military service if you were male, and to seek it out if you were female.
Choosing a career would be the next important step in BAM. It is imperative to avoid large corporations or government service. Working for a non-profit would be a good start, especially if you worked as a volunteer, without pay, and made an income by selling an unusual product online, especially one that was homemade. This would probably limit your income enough to qualify as BAM, since it is doubtful that there have ever been wealthy mavericks. If there are any, they take no deductions, while striving to pay as much of the tax burden as possible.
Once a career has been chosen, it is important not to stay with it too long, but instead to seek a new adventure every couple of years.
Marriage is the next big step. Well, not-marriage might be a better choice. They used to call it living together in sin. It would be important not to call that significant other husband or wife. Think of something else. Being gay would help—gay people have all kinds of different names for the people they aren’t allowed to marry. It would be essential to follow one’s own preferences, though, because mavericks are stubbornly independent, not people who bow down to societal expectations. Marriage to a person who is obviously quite different than you is a must. Different as to color, height (at least 18 inches), weight (at least 100 pounds), intelligence, wealth, career, family—radical differences here can all contribute to one’s success at BAM. Gender has an opposite effect in this case, however, since choosing a similar gender for not-marriage actually increases maverick-ness.
True mavericks are political. They vote. They vote in every election, and they vote about every issue and choose between every single candidate on the ballot, even the dogcatcher, should that be an elected position on the ballot. Not only do mavericks vote, they educate themselves about everything on the ballot, and make choices outside of party lines. No piddling Republican or Democrat, liberal or conservative, labels for them! Mavericks never worry about throwing their votes away by choosing a candidate with absolutely no chance of winning. They’ll even write in names if they want. Sure, it takes more time to BAM, but nobody promised you a rose garden, right? Besides, a maverick would prefer cactus to roses, but only in the Pacific Northwest.
Another biggie is choice of church or religion. It is important to realize that these are not necessarily related. One can be Buddhist in one’s soul while sitting uncomfortably in a Presbyterian pew. Adopting an unusual religion is of the essence. Perhaps one that requires yellow robes, and chanting and playing the tambourine in airports. There are untold numbers of outlandish religions to choose from. One could even switch every couple of years, just as one chooses a new career.
Choice of children is another area one must be careful about. Having children who are obviously related to each other is an impediment to BAM. This means that adoption is just about the only alternative. This is good, though, because there are a lot of children out there who really need a good, maverick, home. Bringing more children into a maverick-starved world is probably not a good idea. The only other viable choice is to have no children at all.
Probably the biggest choice that one must make in order to truly be a maverick is in personal values—how one lives life from a moral perspective. Just the fact that one actually lives life from a moral perspective! I’m not talking sex, here, when I speak of morals, I’m talking ethics, principles, integrity, what guides your decisions, how you decide what is right and what is wrong.
I’ve heard of a true maverick who suggested that we all live our lives according to the Golden Rule. You know, do unto others? This was said in all seriousness, and it was suggested that we could all think this way. Ask how an action of yours might affect someone else, and then do it if you’d like it done to you, and don’t do it if you wouldn’t. Even if you personally gained from doing something to others that you wouldn’t like to have done to you. Isn’t that amazing? This is where the rubber meets the road, potential mavericks. This is the grad-school of maverick-ness. Have you got what it takes to graduate with a BAM degree?
Saturday, October 11, 2008
John McCain Insulted Me (And You)
When John McCain chose Sarah Palin as his running mate, my gut said, “Wow, what a great choice!” Of course, I’d never heard of Sarah Palin then, and neither had anyone else. Just the fact that he chose a woman as his running mate got my attention. I hated giving up Hillary. I really, really, wanted Senator Obama to choose her as his running mate, and I was disappointed that he instead chose Joe Biden. McCain’s choice seemed to suit his maverick image, with which I was familiar from two-and-a-half-decades living in Arizona.
After information about Sarah Palin began to appear in the media, I was gobsmacked, as our Brit friends say. How in the world did Senator McCain, not to mention the entire Republican Party, think that this woman would be a suitable Vice President of the largest economy on earth? The largest military? One of the most developed countries? MY country? I heard people raving about her. How she is “common” (this is not an insult in the U.S.), how she’s a “real” person. How she’s “just like me.” All that may be true, but why aren’t you running for national office, Bambi?
John McCain has been serving the United States for all of his lengthy life. First, as a student in the Naval Academy, then as a soldier and prisoner of war, then in elected office for the last 26 years. Has this service made the man cynical? So cynical that he would choose an uneducated, inexperienced, pretty, girl to be his heartbeat away?
Don’t you find that insulting? I do. Senator McCain knows quite a lot about the military. He serves on the Armed Services Committee, along with other committees. He also has cancer. Cancer that he is unwilling to talk about with the American public. This man has had a hard life. Let’s face it—being a POW for nearly six years would take a year or two off anyone’s life. The additional stress of being the President of the U.S. could have a negative effect on his life—it could even cause his death.
And so, John McCain, lifelong civil servant, chose Sarah Palin to be his running mate and potential vice president. Does this make any sense to you? That a canny politician like John McCain would make a choice like that? Makes me wonder who is pulling his strings.
Oh, and back to the insult. I felt so odd about that choice of John’s that it took me a long time to identify what it was that made me uncomfortable. The answer is that anyone who would choose Sarah Palin to be the potential next president of the United States has no respect for this country. Not for its military, not for its government, not for its Constitution, not for its values. Sarah Palin as Vice President and potentially President of the United States is an insult to us all. It is even an insult to people who think Barack Obama is a nigger, a terrorist and related to Bin Laden...if only they knew. If only they knew.
After information about Sarah Palin began to appear in the media, I was gobsmacked, as our Brit friends say. How in the world did Senator McCain, not to mention the entire Republican Party, think that this woman would be a suitable Vice President of the largest economy on earth? The largest military? One of the most developed countries? MY country? I heard people raving about her. How she is “common” (this is not an insult in the U.S.), how she’s a “real” person. How she’s “just like me.” All that may be true, but why aren’t you running for national office, Bambi?
John McCain has been serving the United States for all of his lengthy life. First, as a student in the Naval Academy, then as a soldier and prisoner of war, then in elected office for the last 26 years. Has this service made the man cynical? So cynical that he would choose an uneducated, inexperienced, pretty, girl to be his heartbeat away?
Don’t you find that insulting? I do. Senator McCain knows quite a lot about the military. He serves on the Armed Services Committee, along with other committees. He also has cancer. Cancer that he is unwilling to talk about with the American public. This man has had a hard life. Let’s face it—being a POW for nearly six years would take a year or two off anyone’s life. The additional stress of being the President of the U.S. could have a negative effect on his life—it could even cause his death.
And so, John McCain, lifelong civil servant, chose Sarah Palin to be his running mate and potential vice president. Does this make any sense to you? That a canny politician like John McCain would make a choice like that? Makes me wonder who is pulling his strings.
Oh, and back to the insult. I felt so odd about that choice of John’s that it took me a long time to identify what it was that made me uncomfortable. The answer is that anyone who would choose Sarah Palin to be the potential next president of the United States has no respect for this country. Not for its military, not for its government, not for its Constitution, not for its values. Sarah Palin as Vice President and potentially President of the United States is an insult to us all. It is even an insult to people who think Barack Obama is a nigger, a terrorist and related to Bin Laden...if only they knew. If only they knew.
Doomed to Repeat?
In the last couple of weeks, I've heard two different people say something negative about having a degree in history. One was about herself, and another was about her daughter. I'm always a bit mystified when anyone seems ashamed of having a degree--no matter what it might be in--just hanging in there, paying the bills, and doing the work is enough to make me respect a person with a degree. Some folks even learn something while they're in college!
Lately, I've wished I knew more about history. I've done some reading, but when you really get down to it, it just isn't that easy to find out what "really" happened. What they teach in school was never very interesting to me, and with every new history class, it seemed that we had to start back at the beginning, and never got much past the Declaration of Independence. The people in the history books certainly never seemed real to me. They weren't human, just men in white wigs who talked funny.
There is no doubt that we live in unique times. Never before has a black person run for president of the United States. That pales, of course, (pun intended), when you think about all the brown and black people who lead countries all over the world. The level of rage and divisiveness we're seeing now may be unprecedented, too. Except when you think back to the early 1960s. And the economic problems we're having now--is there a precedent for those? The answer is yes. What we're seeing now isn't so different than financial crises that have occurred in the past. Not in the Stone Age past, but in the last 40 years.
History is something that both comforts and confronts. When I see that something I'm staying awake at night worrying about has happened before, and most of us don't even remember it, well, that makes me feel better. And when I see that we just keep repeating the same old dumb stuff, then I feel sad. Maybe if I feel sad enough, I'll get out and do something about it!
You just can't depend on your news source to put things in perspective. After all, they exist to sell you something, and if it gives off sparks, it sells a lot faster and a lot better. I find some really good information on Wickipedia. I'm sure there are other internet sites, as well, some even have pictures of those men in white wigs.
Before you give up your night's sleep, read some history. You might learn that now isn't so bad. If not, you may find it so boring, it will put you to sleep!
Lately, I've wished I knew more about history. I've done some reading, but when you really get down to it, it just isn't that easy to find out what "really" happened. What they teach in school was never very interesting to me, and with every new history class, it seemed that we had to start back at the beginning, and never got much past the Declaration of Independence. The people in the history books certainly never seemed real to me. They weren't human, just men in white wigs who talked funny.
There is no doubt that we live in unique times. Never before has a black person run for president of the United States. That pales, of course, (pun intended), when you think about all the brown and black people who lead countries all over the world. The level of rage and divisiveness we're seeing now may be unprecedented, too. Except when you think back to the early 1960s. And the economic problems we're having now--is there a precedent for those? The answer is yes. What we're seeing now isn't so different than financial crises that have occurred in the past. Not in the Stone Age past, but in the last 40 years.
History is something that both comforts and confronts. When I see that something I'm staying awake at night worrying about has happened before, and most of us don't even remember it, well, that makes me feel better. And when I see that we just keep repeating the same old dumb stuff, then I feel sad. Maybe if I feel sad enough, I'll get out and do something about it!
You just can't depend on your news source to put things in perspective. After all, they exist to sell you something, and if it gives off sparks, it sells a lot faster and a lot better. I find some really good information on Wickipedia. I'm sure there are other internet sites, as well, some even have pictures of those men in white wigs.
Before you give up your night's sleep, read some history. You might learn that now isn't so bad. If not, you may find it so boring, it will put you to sleep!
Friday, October 10, 2008
The Biggest Job Search Ever
The Biggest Job Search Ever
By Lee Lawton
Congratulations! You have done such an incredible job serving as the CEO of the largest corporation on the planet, that it will take two people to replace you. The decision is entirely up to you, as you have the complete confidence of the Board of Directors. You more than deserve the multi-billion-dollar retirement package we’ve put together for you. May you enjoy it in great health and happiness!
Here are some factors to consider while making your decision:
There are approximately 4 million employees in Your Company, serving a client base of 305 million people.
Your Company uses nearly 10 million square miles of the planet.
Your Company has a current budget of over $3 trillion dollars.
Right now, Your Company is overspent to the tune of $407 billion dollars.
There are 535 people on the Board of Directors, who are elected by our clients.
You may not have reviewed your job description in some time, so here is a summary:
The CEO of Your Company is responsible for:
-the safety of the Company as a whole, as well as the safety of all employees and clients
-business arrangements with other Companies around the world
-meetings with the CEOs of other Companies around the world
-informing the Board of Directors about the overall condition of Your Company
-approving or vetoing all decisions made by the Board of Directors
-making sure that all of the Company’s Rules and Regulations are obeyed
-appointing all Department Heads and Human Resources personnel
-granting reprieves and pardons for rule-breakers
Since we will be hiring a team to replace you, there will now be a Vice-CEO, who will serve as the agent of the CEO, and would take over the job of the CEO should the CEO die or be unable to carry out the duties of that job. The Vice-CEO will also serve to break any tie votes in the Board of Directors.
After an exhaustive search, we have narrowed the field of applicants to two teams. Here is a short description of their qualifications:
Team A:
For CEO: 72-year-old male. Graduate, military academy. On the Board of Directors of Your Company for 26 years, representing a client base numbering approximately 6.5 million, with gross earnings of $232 billion.
For Vice-CEO: 44-year-old woman. College graduate, after 4 transfers, with a degree in journalism. 10 years representing a client base numbering approximately 5,500 with a budget of less than $5 million. 2 years representing a client base numbering 670,000 with gross earnings of $2.9 billion.
Team B:
For CEO: 47-year-old male. College graduate with a degree in political science, specializing in international relations. Law degree. 7 years representing a client base numbering nearly 800,000. No gross earnings available. On the Board of Directors of Your Company for 3 years, representing a client base numbering 12.8 million, with gross earnings of $40 billion.
For Vice-CEO: 66-year-old male. College graduate, with a degree in political science and history. Law degree. On the Board of Directors of Your Company for 35 years representing a client base numbering approximately 900,000, with gross earnings of $43 billion.
Your Company realizes that it is very difficult to choose, based only on these facts. There is much more information available, of course, much of it subjective, and completely unrelated to the job description. We ask only that you review the duties of the CEO, take into account the possibility that the Vice-CEO may be required to assume the duties of the CEO, and choose the team best qualified to manage Your Company.
Good luck!
By Lee Lawton
Congratulations! You have done such an incredible job serving as the CEO of the largest corporation on the planet, that it will take two people to replace you. The decision is entirely up to you, as you have the complete confidence of the Board of Directors. You more than deserve the multi-billion-dollar retirement package we’ve put together for you. May you enjoy it in great health and happiness!
Here are some factors to consider while making your decision:
There are approximately 4 million employees in Your Company, serving a client base of 305 million people.
Your Company uses nearly 10 million square miles of the planet.
Your Company has a current budget of over $3 trillion dollars.
Right now, Your Company is overspent to the tune of $407 billion dollars.
There are 535 people on the Board of Directors, who are elected by our clients.
You may not have reviewed your job description in some time, so here is a summary:
The CEO of Your Company is responsible for:
-the safety of the Company as a whole, as well as the safety of all employees and clients
-business arrangements with other Companies around the world
-meetings with the CEOs of other Companies around the world
-informing the Board of Directors about the overall condition of Your Company
-approving or vetoing all decisions made by the Board of Directors
-making sure that all of the Company’s Rules and Regulations are obeyed
-appointing all Department Heads and Human Resources personnel
-granting reprieves and pardons for rule-breakers
Since we will be hiring a team to replace you, there will now be a Vice-CEO, who will serve as the agent of the CEO, and would take over the job of the CEO should the CEO die or be unable to carry out the duties of that job. The Vice-CEO will also serve to break any tie votes in the Board of Directors.
After an exhaustive search, we have narrowed the field of applicants to two teams. Here is a short description of their qualifications:
Team A:
For CEO: 72-year-old male. Graduate, military academy. On the Board of Directors of Your Company for 26 years, representing a client base numbering approximately 6.5 million, with gross earnings of $232 billion.
For Vice-CEO: 44-year-old woman. College graduate, after 4 transfers, with a degree in journalism. 10 years representing a client base numbering approximately 5,500 with a budget of less than $5 million. 2 years representing a client base numbering 670,000 with gross earnings of $2.9 billion.
Team B:
For CEO: 47-year-old male. College graduate with a degree in political science, specializing in international relations. Law degree. 7 years representing a client base numbering nearly 800,000. No gross earnings available. On the Board of Directors of Your Company for 3 years, representing a client base numbering 12.8 million, with gross earnings of $40 billion.
For Vice-CEO: 66-year-old male. College graduate, with a degree in political science and history. Law degree. On the Board of Directors of Your Company for 35 years representing a client base numbering approximately 900,000, with gross earnings of $43 billion.
Your Company realizes that it is very difficult to choose, based only on these facts. There is much more information available, of course, much of it subjective, and completely unrelated to the job description. We ask only that you review the duties of the CEO, take into account the possibility that the Vice-CEO may be required to assume the duties of the CEO, and choose the team best qualified to manage Your Company.
Good luck!
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Shoot If You Hate...
Shoot If You Hate…..
The recent shooting in a Tennessee Unitarian Universalist Church only serves to remind us that today’s solution to discomfort is to kill somebody. Used to be we’d kick the dog when things got bad, but now, we grab a gun and kill somebody we think is different from us.
So, yeah, let’s shoot if we hate:
Gays—16 percent of hate crimes target gays. That leaves a lot of folks, tho doesn’t it? Jeez, what if you’re one of “these” people:?
Jews-- Almost 70 percent of anti-religious hate crimes are commited against Jews. Compared to “only” 11 percent against Muslims (2006 FBI statistics), a number that has risen sharply since 9/11. There are hate crimes on record against almost every religion on earth. Jews really ate it before and during WWII, not to mention all of history before that. 6 million and counting. Jewish and gay? So sorry. How about Wiccan? Nine million and still counting. Makes being a Unitarian seem as safe as nurseries.
Races--niggers, spicks, slant-eyes, kikes, squaws, the list goes on, but now that we’re so politically correct, Goggle doesn’t provide a list of the words that were so popular only a generation ago. Race-based hate crimes accounted for 55 percent of all hate crimes in the U.S. in 2006. Sixty percent of all offenders were white. Good to know who the superior race is, isn’t it?
Being poor—37 million Americans are below the Federal poverty line, and believe me, folks, that is some kind of poor. Nearly a third of Americans are living from day to day, paycheck (or none) to paycheck. Now, there’s a lot of folks to hate…including oneself.
Being unemployed—current statistics say that 5.5 percent of Americans are unemployed. During the Great Depression, nearly a quarter of Americans were unemployed. That was then, this is now. During the Depression, most women did not work, nor were they seeking work, and therefore not counted in the unemployment statistics. Now, both men and women are working or seeking work. The numbers cannot really be compared, as society has changed so much. Suffice it to say that more and more people are underemployed or unemployed, and soft landings are becoming more and more rare.
Children—we may not think of crimes against children as being hate crimes, but how else can you explain child abuse, child molestation, kidnapping, beatings, and child murder? These aren’t hate crimes against the child victims as much as they are hate crimes against the perpetrator—who suffered as a child and who passes the violence along against others. Hate yourself? Kill somebody.
Women—the biggest losers of all. God has hated women ever since Eve, and all the good Christian men learned that lesson well. Not to mention all the Muslim men, the Jewish men, the Atheist men, the Islamic men, the men who have been charged with making the world a place where men are MEN and women are dirt. One-third of all women on earth are harmed because they are women—the biggest hate-crime of all.
Of all the species on earth, only humans hate ourselves, devour ourselves, seek to rub ourselves out. No other species goes to the extent that we do. Not black widow spiders, not crocodiles, not sharks, not bears, not lemmings, not cougars, not viruses, not bacteria, not one other living species on this planet seeks to rub out its own. Just humans—the human race, the folks who have been charged by our various and different gods to take care of the planet and each other. What the fuck!?
The recent shooting in a Tennessee Unitarian Universalist Church only serves to remind us that today’s solution to discomfort is to kill somebody. Used to be we’d kick the dog when things got bad, but now, we grab a gun and kill somebody we think is different from us.
So, yeah, let’s shoot if we hate:
Gays—16 percent of hate crimes target gays. That leaves a lot of folks, tho doesn’t it? Jeez, what if you’re one of “these” people:?
Jews-- Almost 70 percent of anti-religious hate crimes are commited against Jews. Compared to “only” 11 percent against Muslims (2006 FBI statistics), a number that has risen sharply since 9/11. There are hate crimes on record against almost every religion on earth. Jews really ate it before and during WWII, not to mention all of history before that. 6 million and counting. Jewish and gay? So sorry. How about Wiccan? Nine million and still counting. Makes being a Unitarian seem as safe as nurseries.
Races--niggers, spicks, slant-eyes, kikes, squaws, the list goes on, but now that we’re so politically correct, Goggle doesn’t provide a list of the words that were so popular only a generation ago. Race-based hate crimes accounted for 55 percent of all hate crimes in the U.S. in 2006. Sixty percent of all offenders were white. Good to know who the superior race is, isn’t it?
Being poor—37 million Americans are below the Federal poverty line, and believe me, folks, that is some kind of poor. Nearly a third of Americans are living from day to day, paycheck (or none) to paycheck. Now, there’s a lot of folks to hate…including oneself.
Being unemployed—current statistics say that 5.5 percent of Americans are unemployed. During the Great Depression, nearly a quarter of Americans were unemployed. That was then, this is now. During the Depression, most women did not work, nor were they seeking work, and therefore not counted in the unemployment statistics. Now, both men and women are working or seeking work. The numbers cannot really be compared, as society has changed so much. Suffice it to say that more and more people are underemployed or unemployed, and soft landings are becoming more and more rare.
Children—we may not think of crimes against children as being hate crimes, but how else can you explain child abuse, child molestation, kidnapping, beatings, and child murder? These aren’t hate crimes against the child victims as much as they are hate crimes against the perpetrator—who suffered as a child and who passes the violence along against others. Hate yourself? Kill somebody.
Women—the biggest losers of all. God has hated women ever since Eve, and all the good Christian men learned that lesson well. Not to mention all the Muslim men, the Jewish men, the Atheist men, the Islamic men, the men who have been charged with making the world a place where men are MEN and women are dirt. One-third of all women on earth are harmed because they are women—the biggest hate-crime of all.
Of all the species on earth, only humans hate ourselves, devour ourselves, seek to rub ourselves out. No other species goes to the extent that we do. Not black widow spiders, not crocodiles, not sharks, not bears, not lemmings, not cougars, not viruses, not bacteria, not one other living species on this planet seeks to rub out its own. Just humans—the human race, the folks who have been charged by our various and different gods to take care of the planet and each other. What the fuck!?
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Surely We Ain’t That Stupid, Are We Shirley?
How much is $700 billion? It comes to $4,780 for every taxpayer in the U.S. What was the last thing you bought for $4,780? The last thing you bought and didn't get to take home?
There is one reason for this and one reason only (oh, if only the rest of life could be as uncomplicated!). Greed. Period. Greed on the part of Wall Street. And simple laziness on the part of Washington. It is so sadly familiar, isn't it?
Is there some particular reason we should bail out companies that have been acting outside of banking rules and regs just so they can make huge profits (or not)? They paid their dues and they took their chances. Now, when Republicans say that government should be out of our lives (everywhere except the bedroom, that is), Treasury Secretary Paulson wants to have $700 billion to play with all by himself. Gosh, wouldn't that be fun? Just think of the fun you could have with this kind of monopoly money! No questions asked, no nada, just do what you will with the money. And this is a man who was chairman and CEO of investment banking at Goldman Sachs--the very company that Warren Buffet is putting up money for. Why would he do that? Why would this one man put up $5 billion dollars of his own money for the company that the Treasury Secretary used to run? The company that is going down the tubes with the rest of the greedy guts who took a chance, made tons o' money, and now that the money has stopped coming in because of the crappy economy, they're all bailing out. Huh? Is this how you would run a business?
I'm no expert, that's for sure, but I'm wondering what would really happen if we just let these guys go down the tubes. And I mean flushed away like the shit they are. Everyone who is fortunate to have a mortgage financed by these companies just gets to keep their houses free of charge. Nobody to write a monthly check to, anymore. No more paperwork. All gone. Oh, sure, investors would get bitten, but let's define investors--folks who have extra money every month after they pay their bills, right?
Everybody knows that investments have some degree of risk, isn't that right? So, under the above-mentioned plan, investors lose money, commensurate with what they had to invest, and the rest of us lose nada, commensurate with what we had to invest. Doesn't that seem fair?
And if Warren Buffet wants to keep Paulson's company alive so Paulson has a place to play a few months from now, why not? Let the rest of them take the billions they've already made and go ruin some other companies! And leave us with $4,780 in our pocket that we earned the hard way.
The Republicans just gave us a whole bunch of money back, right? How many folks got $4,780? Anyone? Anyone? Now, they want it all back, plus quite a bit more. There are guys in Portland, OR who are saying that this is the "October Surprise", i.e., the thing that the Bush administration will do to keep Republicans (if not Dick and George) in office. I think we have even juicier things to look forward to, but let's please not buy this crap. Make 'em take down a few more tall buildings, okay?
There is one reason for this and one reason only (oh, if only the rest of life could be as uncomplicated!). Greed. Period. Greed on the part of Wall Street. And simple laziness on the part of Washington. It is so sadly familiar, isn't it?
Is there some particular reason we should bail out companies that have been acting outside of banking rules and regs just so they can make huge profits (or not)? They paid their dues and they took their chances. Now, when Republicans say that government should be out of our lives (everywhere except the bedroom, that is), Treasury Secretary Paulson wants to have $700 billion to play with all by himself. Gosh, wouldn't that be fun? Just think of the fun you could have with this kind of monopoly money! No questions asked, no nada, just do what you will with the money. And this is a man who was chairman and CEO of investment banking at Goldman Sachs--the very company that Warren Buffet is putting up money for. Why would he do that? Why would this one man put up $5 billion dollars of his own money for the company that the Treasury Secretary used to run? The company that is going down the tubes with the rest of the greedy guts who took a chance, made tons o' money, and now that the money has stopped coming in because of the crappy economy, they're all bailing out. Huh? Is this how you would run a business?
I'm no expert, that's for sure, but I'm wondering what would really happen if we just let these guys go down the tubes. And I mean flushed away like the shit they are. Everyone who is fortunate to have a mortgage financed by these companies just gets to keep their houses free of charge. Nobody to write a monthly check to, anymore. No more paperwork. All gone. Oh, sure, investors would get bitten, but let's define investors--folks who have extra money every month after they pay their bills, right?
Everybody knows that investments have some degree of risk, isn't that right? So, under the above-mentioned plan, investors lose money, commensurate with what they had to invest, and the rest of us lose nada, commensurate with what we had to invest. Doesn't that seem fair?
And if Warren Buffet wants to keep Paulson's company alive so Paulson has a place to play a few months from now, why not? Let the rest of them take the billions they've already made and go ruin some other companies! And leave us with $4,780 in our pocket that we earned the hard way.
The Republicans just gave us a whole bunch of money back, right? How many folks got $4,780? Anyone? Anyone? Now, they want it all back, plus quite a bit more. There are guys in Portland, OR who are saying that this is the "October Surprise", i.e., the thing that the Bush administration will do to keep Republicans (if not Dick and George) in office. I think we have even juicier things to look forward to, but let's please not buy this crap. Make 'em take down a few more tall buildings, okay?
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